Darwin’s Disappointment # Men Arise

Glenn W. Harrell 1-18

Yes, Darwin is disappointed, and women everywhere are questioning his wisdom. You see, according to Darwin, the species of homo sapiens must continue its evolution into and through the animal kingdom. When he told us this “fact”, we believed him, well, because we liked the outcome. We are primates who act and live like primates. What do male primates around the world do? That’s right baby! Ooo-lala!

Let’s go back in time some 65 million years, give or take a few million. We men, including Weinstein, were nothing more than a flying bat of sorts. (The bat came from primordial sludge–pretty sure)

He was a cute little bugger and he was also interested in three things for the most part. Sex, drugs and rock-n-roll. No, our best scientists, primatologists, and paleontologists suggest that we leave off the drugs and the music idea. That was to show up later in the evolution of this fine species after he shed the wings and invented tie-dye. (see the 1960’s) OK. Now then. Something like 150 million years ago, the humanoid appeared in Africa. Rumor has it, he had been vacationing somewhere in the Richesgalore region (Modern day Hollywood) before this African “yoo hoo–here I am” moment in time. Earliest photos reveal a man who looks curiously like Jerry Springer. There you have it. Thanks Darwin. We all needed this understanding of our origin. It really helps.

 

Now back to reality. Darwin, were he alive today, would be shocked and awed that:

A United States President, Hollywood personalities, news anchors, athletes, priests, ministers, cops, bankers, lawyers, plumbers, musicians, dancers—All of us men, and all those who are still uncertain, despite the physical evidence, …Shocked! Shocked! Shocked! that any one of us would be accused by a female for behaviors that have been labeled as “misogynistic”, “demeaning”, “hurtful” and the like. If Darwin knew that good men, fine men, simply following the order of evolutions demand, were losing their jobs and some going to jail for, “inappropriate” behaviors, he would come out swinging the bat of primate necessities and he wouldn’t care who found themselves on the other end. Just ask any modern-day comedian or very confused late-night talk show host if this isn’t true. (see # ME TOO)

 

Once Darwin heard of these women (girls and boys) complaining of abuse at the hands of “naturally aggressive” men, he would put these ladies in their evolutionary places in forthright fashion. How dare they contradict his theory. This is very much a slap in Darwin’s dusty face. And you women, where might you hide from your role in the human species evolutionary chart? You are supposed to use and abuse your sexuality to manipulate the male, crave power, love control, spread rumors and gossip. (and get better at it over time—Though Darwin has you down as inferior to the male) These are all things, despite no confessions from you as of late, you are naturally quite good at. Might Darwin insist that you go to jail for Freud, I mean fraud, and evasion? In jail, I remind you, it is survival of the fittest.

 

Here are our Darwinian assignments, if we are but willing to accept them.

—Men, fight for your rights to continue your evolutionary process. You feel like grabbing a woman, grab her.

—Women, you want something you cannot have, and you want it badly enough? That man who can give it to you will be a simple primate push-over because such weakness is in his DNA. Just trace it back to that sex-driven little bat we spoke of earlier.

Now then, it appears that your man still needs a few more million years of your pure and innocent influence to finally become the type of male you desire. Until then, use him and abuse him because you can. You too are a common primate, and never forget that.

 

Women who do not want to be objectified? Talk to your primate sisters about their behaviors. Evolution allows for you to fight this, but not if you doll up, sleep around, and strip down for the male’s attention, power and money. What did the female chimp say to the male chimp when she flashed here femaleness at him? She asked, “what are you staring at?” He replied, “Whatever it is you are advertising!” True to evolution’s design, over time, women have gotten better at deserving more objectification than their chimp cousins, and are obviously so much smarter. Clever how this gender condemns the male and comes out looking so innocent.

 

In today’s deceitful world, men who do not want to be caught and prosecuted for simply acting Darwinian must be prudent, patient and thankful for the for evolutionary powers that enable him to escape the security cameras eye.

 

Evolution is such a wonderful thing. Why must all these “morally superior” people continue messing up Darwin’s theory and plan for man? I say we should pray, I mean call, upon Darwin’s spirit and welcome him back into our schools from where we kicked him out. We superimposed upon him a film of moral consciousness that does not belong. We started hugging trees, caring for bears and whales more than primate mankind. We began listening to people who claimed to be victims of “sexual predators”. Heaven, I mean mother nature, I mean genderless nature — help us!

 

There is so much for Darwin to be ticked-off about these days. I appeal to you. Welcome Darwin Back into your life and let man be the man he was created, I mean uh, evolved to be. Not this namby-pamby, Jesus is love, afraid to take what he wants man–let him be the aggressive survivalist he is proven by natures evolution to be. Let’s not disappoint Charles a moment longer. #Arise Men, you can evolve better than this.

_________

To the believers at Corinth:
“Don’t be immoral in matters of sex. That is a sin against your own body in a way that no other sin is. You surely know that your body is a temple where the Holy Spirit lives.
The Spirit is in you and is a gift from God. You are no longer your own. 
God paid a great price for you. So use your body to honor God.”                                               
                                                                                                                       I Corinthians 6:18-20

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