Washington DC—
Now that Judge Kavanaugh is affirmed and sworn in, Congress has determined that none of the FBI background checks given to any of the Justices are to be trusted.
In fact, the FBI is no longer to be trusted.
Beginning December 1, each of the SCOTUS judges will go before THE judge. JUDGE JUDY.
The process will be simple. Here are the rules and the procedural manifest details.
- Do not be late. 8:00 AM sharp
- Per Judy–One Judge per day. Plan to be there all day. (sack lunch provided)
- Bring your birth certificate and Social Security card (originals only unless you just can’t find it)
- Bring proof of American Citizenship. Photo ID not required. (current electric bill will substitute just fine)
Each Judge shall answer the following questions:
- Before the age of 10, did you ever lie, steal or cheat?
- After the age of 10 and before the age of 20, did you ever sleep on a bed where the mattress and or pillow had tags removed?
- Did you ever knowingly drink milk past the expiration date?
- The bicycle you brought home: Was it a gift or did you promise to pay for it?
Failure to pass the full exam of Judge Judy will bring the harshest punishment with possible expulsion from the Office of SCOTUS..
Passing the tests means that each Judge and their families will receive all-expense-paid trips to Disney World.
Thanks Judge Judy!
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